Introduction to who Chris is:
Chris: “I had a career in corporate America for 15 years and I am so lucky to have spent a better part of that career in New York City, even though I’m an Angeleno I feel more proud to say that I became a New Yorker and it was an incredible 11 years of my adulthood and New York is a very special place. But there was a pivotal period and a moment in the summer of 2019 Kirsty when I was coming back from a wedding in France and, you know, every other time I saw that New York skyline pricy coming back from a trip or out of town, I was always in awe and proud to call the city my home. But that day in the cab ride home Kirsty I had tears rolling down my face. Like, yeah, and I can feel this gut emotional reaction that I was not supposed to be back. And that’s when I yeah and that’s when I told myself that, you know we only have one life to live.
A cousin of mine who was only in his 40s had recently passed and I thought, you know what, I’ve always had this 20 year fixation love affair with London. And I thought, you know what, I got to give it a shot and if I don’t, then I might regret never trying and my life. I like to say was in cruise control and a lot of people know this as being in the comfort zone and speaking of mindset Kirsty, I knew that if I continued in this cruise control which was a very nice comfortable life I knew that I would be stuck in this fixed mindset, not that I that I didn’t have this curiosity anymore but like I might stagnant. So, yeah, that’s how I ended up just quitting everything and moving to London, things didn’t work out for visa reasons and then I ended up in Portugal, which I’m very pleased to be.”
How to create a new life and be bold when moving away:
Chris: “I like to describe cruise control, as I said like, when you’re in the comfort zone when and I knew that I was in cruise control, you know like when you’re in a car, Kirsty right cruise control, you basically lift the pedal and it does the driving for you, like you don’t need to put any effort, and everything is easy. That’s how I felt my life was, it was good but comfortable and easy. And so what I had to go through in my mind when I, when I made that decision in that cab ride home first day that I’m just gonna go for it. Life is too short and I don’t want to live with regrets. I did something that I do that works for me every single time Kirsty when I, when I set a goal that I want to achieve, and it’s, it’s, I guess a mindset trick but it keeps me accountable. So I set a date. In my mind, as well as in my journal somewhere I can see it as a very specific date it’s not like this summer, I pick an exact date, and that I want to achieve whatever I want to set my heart on, and then I work backwards to plot every action. You have a launch date and then yeah basically plot a timeline.
What are all the steps I need to take in order to meet that launch date? I compared it to marketing and used that launch day. Besides, if you’re not a marketer is, is that, you know the the beauty of having a specific day, makes you accountable to take actions towards that date versus this vague like, you know, in the summer I’ll do this because, because like you you think like, oh, because you haven’t set a specific date you’re like, oh I don’t come like you don’t take it too seriously. And then when you’re writing it down. It’s like, you know, a part of manifestation like it’s worth to me every time. Like when I told you that I told myself I was going to, in that cab ride hold I told myself I’m going to give exactly one year, it was just after July 4 weekend. I literally moved to London, July, like within a couple days of that cab ride home.
One year later, and it’s happened every other time major things including like wanting to launch P.S. Younger Self I said I was gonna launch it in four weeks by, I forget the exact date and I launched it two weeks.
I believe in the manifestation, but, but with a little grain of salt, like I, I don’t believe in manifestation we’re like okay I’m just gonna think, sit here and think about it, think about it, think about it and then it’ll manifest like I don’t believe in that. And so to your point, like the logic behind it like you have to put the work. The work is, you know, I know I want to achieve something, and I believe in myself and I trust the universe will allow me to achieve it, if it’s in my path, but I can’t sit here and have like wishful thinking I have to put the work in it too.”
Mindset Coping Mechanisms:
Chris: “Through my personal work and incredible interviews I had I personally feel that fear is a choice. Besides our biological in a part of our body that we have, you know fear of danger. Anything that holds us back and truly wanting to pursue what we truly desire, how we want to live authentically in this in this world, whether it’s, you know, I’ve always wanted to live abroad, or I’ve always wanted to start a business or something right but you hold yourself back because fear of failure, fear of fear of leaving the security of a comfortable job and pay-check. So, I had to face my fears and I had a lot Kirsty I’m going to be very honest, I had a lot of fears about holy crap, am I just gonna quit this amazing career that I developed where I got to a very good place. And, you know, very nice paying salary that that was affording me a very nice lifestyle….am I just gonna quit all this without secure job?! I went through all the sponsorship route, etc, and I still left without securing a job and I had to take that leap of faith and face my fear, knowing that I would be more disappointed in myself. If I never pursued it because I learned after the fact, even though unfortunately through multiple attempts of getting a visa in London, didn’t work out. I’m super proud of the person and the progress and evolution that I went through. It’s still taking that leap of faith, and I’ll be very honest when when I didn’t get the visas, you know all these visas, and the six month, passport, time period for an American to stay in London didn’t work out. again I had self doubt, like, am I a failure. I just quit my life, you know, very nice corporate career and then not making it?! But you know what, it’s so incredible. How, where life leads you, because I’d never would have imagined I would end up in Portugal like living the life of, you know I on my own terms, which is my modus operandi that, oh my god I created this lifestyle and London didn’t work out because it was supposed to lead me here.”
I would say besides, you know, chasing my curiosity, one hack that has really been profound, helping me achieve my self mastery is actually to pause, because I’ve shared this when I interviewed you on my podcast but I’ve become more self aware and being self aware of things that trigger me, or when I’m being real with myself, in regards to like my emotions and how I feel. Then I take a pause, because when I take a moment to pause and allows me to reflect…oh, am I being reactive. For instance, from my egoic mind, versus, like, Oh, am I really hurt right now, versus, like, am I, or am I just like being reactive to something like unnecessarily so having that moment to pause has been such a breakthrough and powerful mindset tool that’s allowed me to achieve mastery, to put my ego in check. And never regret any decisions!
Comment your favourite part of the episode on my latest IG.
If you rate the podcast & share a screenshot of your review we will send you our top Mindset Hack!
Are you interested in receiving a quick email from me? Sign up for 66 Days of Mindset Prompts straight to your inbox
If you have a question for us or want to request a guest, comment on our Instagrams ( @kirstyraynor @mindsetandme )
Thank you for your attention and support!
Mindset Coping Mechanisms:
© 2020 Copyright Here
Connection and conversation are my mantras. Hello beautiful, let's do this.